So many plans

Our house is finally on the market, and we have had one viewing already. I've seen two houses I'm interested in buying but can't really put in a serious offer until we have a buyer for ours. So for now, I'm patiently waiting. The plan is to get rid of our mortgage. It is more than likely that we will be closing our wee shop in January, and so having no mortgage will be a huge bonus, as we dont yet know how we plan to make money.

But as I've mentioned before in this blog, we plan to take a trip next year, with our children. We are finally in the stages of planning this now. If we dont sell our house on time we may still go on the trip and leave the house on the market while we are away.

At the moment we are planning a 19 week trip. Steve found a 'round the world' ticket company in the paper that are offering an amazing deal on flights. If we go with the tickets for which we've been quoted we will be flying from London to Los Angeles on February 11th, and spending 10 weeks in America, travelling around the west coast (California etc, all the beaches) and around the Grand Canyon and surrounding area. Then we will be flying from Los Angeles to Aukland in New Zealand and spending 8 weeks touring the north island of New Zealand. From there, we will fly to Hong Kong (this is not optional, its part of the deal!) and spending anything from 3 nights to 2 weeks (depending entirely on funds), before flying back to London. Once in London we may take a week or so to visit with family, or we may just be desperate to get home!

So now we are just mulling it over in our minds before we decide whether to book these tickets and make it all final. I'm so over excited about it all!

While Im hear blogging, I keep meaning to write another blog post about Tinkhani but just havent found the time yet. He has had his sentece reduced from the death penalty to life imprisonment, but he is hoping that he may get this reduced too. If anyone wishes to send money for him again, please let me know. I have just sent him $30 as he was desperate again for food. But I'm sure that is probably all spent by now and I really need to send him some more. If you want to know more you might like to read this blog post about Tinkhani and the conditions in Zambian prisons. As I said in one of my other blog posts, Tinkhani did put on weight from the food he purchased from your donations, and his improved dramatically. His doctor was shocked at the improvement.

Tinkhani Update - and a little general health update about me too!

I was delighted to receive a letter from Tinkhani this week saying that for the first time since he's been in prison he has put on weight. One month after received the money donated by some of my generous blog readers, he has put on 3kg in weight. He is completely delighted, needless to say, and so am I. He has asked me tell you all this good news.

He has also informed me that the Zambian government are re-writing their rules regarding prison sentences. A lot of prisoner have been freed or had their sentences reduced. Tinkhani is hoping that he will no longer face the death penalty and has asked that we all keep this in our prayers and thoughts for him and the other handful of prisoners who are facing death for robbery. Hopefully he will have great news for me in his next letter.

He has sent me some handmade wooden pens, each with a name inscribed into it. There is one for each person that donated money for him. I will have to forward these on to you all individually. There is also one for Tammy who sent him a lovely Christmas card. Tammy if you email me your address I can post it on to you. I will be gathering some more money to send sometime soon, so if anyone wants to donate you can contact me at cleopatrani@hotmail.co.uk

I'm still on crutches at the moment but can just about get by on one crutch now. Although I can't over do it. I went to the doctors today and she seems to think that my middle toe is permanently damaged and will probably be paralyzed. I guess I should be bothered, but I just laughed. It all seems so silly to me. All this fuss over some toes. She also told me that she had received a letter about my jugular artery scan. It seems that they did find something after all, despite waiting almost 3 months for my result appointment. They found a curve in my jugular artery. My appointment to discuss this isnt until the end of August. However the curve is on the left side of my neck, and the noise is in my right ear, so the doctor seems think that this may not explain the problem, although from the letter the consultant seems to think it does. So I guess I have to wait and see. It's a good job I'm so patient eh? :)

My first day at work

Today was my first official day at work! Yes it was. Ok, its not that exciting. I was just working in Dan's shop. But it's my official new part time job. And I loved it. It was so nice to be away from the hassles of every day home life, just for a break. And I know that Dan enjoyed being at home with the kids. He even baked cupcakes with Barney! When I got home from work he had made a four course almost raw meal! Go boy! I think I might go full time. When I say four courses, well, course one was raspberry smoothie, course two was salad with sprouts and baked potato, course three was Barneys cupcakes, and course four was chocolate fondue with lots of fruits. I couldn't eat that bit, but I enjoyed watching the kids enjoy it.





The kids enjoying fondue with Daddy.











Luke took this photo of me this evening.















This is a silly pic of me talking on web cam to Dan! I took a photo of myself. One of those silly moments.







I had a slight worry today. Dan phoned me to say that my friend on death row in America had tried to phone me. He only phones once a year, when its pre-arranged, because it costs me £60 ($120) to accept a collect call from him. So when he phoned unexpectedly it got me worried. Dan didn't accept the call because I wasn't at home anyway. My mind started racing when he told me. I thought that something could be wrong. The panic made me realise how awful it is going to be if or when he receives his execution date.

I mustered up enough courage to phone the prison in Georgia. I phoned once before and got a horrible woman who was no help at all. But this time I explained the situation, that I was phoning from Ireland and it costs me $120 to receive his calls, and the lovely girl put me through to E's councilor. He was a lovely guy and he wrote a message down for me and promised to take it straight to my friend. I was impressed by the amount of respect he had for my death row pal. He assured me that he is not unwell and that he has not received his date yet, so that relieved me. I am glad to know that E will get a message from me and that all is well. Funnily enough I was writing a letter to him at the time he phoned.

Emmeline Pankhurst and the Suffragettes

Written by Annabelle, age 10

At homeschool today I learnt about Emmeline Pankhurst She is the lady who got the right for women to vote. In 1912 some women where called suffragettes they are lady's who want the right to vote. There leader was called Emmelinne Pankhurst she said that suffragettes have to act violently to make people listen to them. Emmeline Pankhurst became the most famous suffragette of all. She married a man called Richard she had tree girls Christabal, Sylvia and Adela. she also had I son (I don't know his name). When emmeline was thirty she went to see some people who worked in an unhealthy place they where match makers. They didn't get paid enough so Emmeline helped them to get more. Emmelines husband richerd died. Emmeline and her oldest girl Christabel wanted to fight for votes and they did. Emmeline and Christabel got arrested and they would not eat. They got weak. So the goverment made a new law called The cat and mouse act where they let them out until they where better. so then they got freed. But then eight months later she came back! world war two came along and the women stayed at home and did the mens jobs until they came back from the war. They did such a good job that they got the right to vote.

The Mourne Mountains, and waffle

Well, life has been hectic as always and I've hardly gotten round to posting anything on the blog. Dan has a week off of work, so this week we plan to chill a bit and spend some family time together. I'm not holding my breath. I'm so used to our busy life getting the better of our free time. And after 13 years of marriage I've yet to see Dan relax.


Today Dan went for a hike up Slieve Donard, in the Mourne Mountains. He has taken to doing that lately on his days off. He also had to take some photos up there for his coursework. I think its 'natural forms' that they are doing this time... rocks, stones, flowers, that sort of thing.









Here are some photos of the views that Dan saw today. Northern Ireland is such a beautiful country. It's the best kept secret of the UK.
I found this other photo of Annabelle and Barney, when Dan madly decided to take them for a drive up the Mournes in the snow, a few weeks ago! (Notice Barney doesn't even have a coat on!)


Last weekend I took Annabelle to the wedding show in the Kings Hall, Belfast, with my sister H (who is getting married) and my sister J. Last time we went I thought Annabelle would love the catwalk shows, so this time I made a point of taking her with me. Needless to say, she took her camera with her, and took millions of photos. Here are two of the best...












The pulsing in my ears is still very bad. One day, about 3 weeks ago, the pulsing suddenly doubled in volume, which it has done many times before, but this time it hasn't ebbed at all. As well as that I've developed a pain in the back of my neck, going up into my head. It's been there every day for 2 weeks and is driving me insane. Its on the right side of my spine, going into my skull. Seen as it's my right ear that is affected by the pulsing, I can't help wondering if the two are connected. Theres still no word from my MRI scan yet. I booked an appointment with the doctor but she's not free till Friday, so I'll have to wait.

I finally managed to sort out the money for Tinkhani, that people donated. I sent it to a church in County Cork. They have a preist working in T's prison. They are putting the money into his account and he will in turn pass it on to T. I know this will make a HUGE difference to his life. He will be able to buy food, and hopefully put on some weight, as well as sanitary items, clothes, blankets and maybe even a little luxury. Not to mention stamps and paper! I would to send out a HUGE THANK YOU to the people who donated money for Tinkhani. I was very touched with the generosity that wsa show, and so was he. You know wh oyou are.

Updates on MRI scan and T in Zambia

I received two bits of ‘news’ today. Firstly I received the appointment for my MRI scan. It is in the evening of the 12th February. Now, it’s a good job I’m not a superstitious person because that it the date of our 13th wedding anniversary! Aha. So instead of a romantic evening staring into each others eyes I will be listening to my favourite CD for an hour in a noisy claustrophobic machine. Oh fun. I am glad to have the appointment, obviously. Waiting is never fun.

Secondly I received a letter back from T in Zambia. I have heard from him since my blog post about him, but this is his first reply since I sent him a parcel and told him about my blog post and the generosity of people who donated money to him. He has told me in this letter how best to use the money from a practical point of view. He did receive the contents of the parcel I sent and nothing was missing. It was good to know that. I sent him a book, and various food items such as nuts, dried fruit, dried meats and some sweets. Anyway, rather than tell you all about it I thought I would type out some of what he says in his letter. So that those of you who gave money to help him can read what he has to say. (He sent 5 beautiful wooden hand painted pens with his letter - each with our name on them, one for each of us - I’ll post a photo of them later)

Dear Beloved sister (Bree)

It’s my sincere prayer and hope that this mail finds you all in good health, both spiritually and physically. With me here I am doing well despite the sentence itself. I always thank God when ever I am given a breath. This is the miracle which God performs in my life each day I wake up and get the beauty of this planet earth. I always maintain one day at a time. How is my friend Barney?

First and foremost I would like to express my heartfelt thanks for your wonderful nice worded mail, and very beautiful Christmas cards sent to me from Dan, yourself, Annabelle and Jimmie. Thank you one again for the fruit sticks, a book, some cashew nuts, a packet of beef jerky and some polo sweets. I enjoyed the food stuffs you sent me. I am more than happy to inform you that the parcel was received very safely and I am the one that opened the parcel in the presence of the officer. I have just started reading the book. This book has come at the right time. I needed something to read. It sounds to be a good book. Thank you very much for the prayers you and other Christians are praying for me. There is power in the prayer of faith. Be assured that your prayers and mine have been answered my our God. We just have to wait for the day God prepared for me to come out of this hell.

Bree, let me tell you one thing. I am not precious, or anything else that uplifts me above any one (creation of God) but I am a simple cool man in the valley of death, but one special thing is that Jesus loves and cares for me very much. It’s the divine love of God that you are able to write to me. it’s the cross of Calvary which has brought us together. I would like to commend you for the good heart you have, as a child of God, to tell you the truth very few people (Christians) who can be like you. Many Christians are sympathetic, but the Lord is telling us to be compassionate. This is the heart of your Father. Since I started corresponding with you, I have seen this quality in you. Thank you once again for writing a blog post about me, and more thanks goes to your Grandad by reading out the blog post at his Sunday Prayer group and for the prayers. I have got no words to express the things you have done for me. I am a man of faith and I believe in prayer very much. I am humbled. I have nothing to give you, be assured that the reward is waiting for you from God. God will not forget the good things you are doing for me. Hebrews 6:10.

I am happy to hear of the Baptist Church Pastor who used to be a missionary here in Zambia. I will be more than glad to hear from him. Being a missionary at one time here in Zambia, he should know Zambia very well. When did he left Zambia?
Glory be to the Almighty God for the phenomenal response you are receiving from the saints of God and through the blog post. Thanks be to God for the help the Saints of God have sent me through you. My humble prayer is that may God add more blessings from where they got the money and add more days to their lives.

Beloved Bree, we prisoners have got a provision of buying food stuffs. There are good officers that buy things for prisoners with our money. We have got very honest and God fearing officers. The officer in charge is the one that appointed the two officers to be buying things for the prisoners. Us prisoners don’t handle any monies. The money is been kept by the two reception officers. So when a prisoner wants something, he just has to give the list to the two officers….

(he then goes on to talk about how best to send the money through the local chaplian etc).

… with this money I will be able to buy the needed food bit by bit. Thank you and God bless.
Coming to my cell. We are only five in a very small cell. There are only 48 cells and they are only meant to accommodate one prisoner in each cell. Now due to overcrowding each cell is now accommodating five to six people. We are 287 prisoners on death row. The cells are very small and have got no toilets and we only use chamber pots for the call of nature. It’s horrible. The people that I am with in the cell are good people. Two of us are Baptist, two are Catholics and one is a member of the new apostolic church. They can not steal anything from me. There are about seven churches in our place.

When they open for us we do all clean our chamber pots and cells. After cleaning the cells and chamber pots we do bath and go for the church services and this is every day. After church I do a bit of exercise. I do read in the word of God most of the time. I like reading very much, so books (Christian books) are welcome. Coming to the issue of the Church in England that they are keen to send something for all of us in the cell to come and share equally. Yes that’s a very good idea. They are free to send us anything that they can afford and that can be of good use to us. Things like toiletries etc. Those things here in our country are very expensive.

Bree, I received a Christmas card from Tammy, your friend in America. Please tell her thank you from me.

(He then talks about the photos and letter I sent him. He thinks H&D are a cute couple, and talks about Barney a bit)

Bree, did you see the clip of the execution of Saddam Hussein? How did you feel? The way Saddam was killed, that’s the very way it is done here where I am. That such of execution is inhumane and barbaric. No one has the right to terminate someone’s life regardless of whatever crime that man did. I felt very bad on the execution of Saddam. Thanks be to God, our current president has vowed not to sign any execution warrants for us on death row. He is a God fearing man, pray for him.

Food is still a big problem here in our prison. Food will never be enough in our prison. As am writing this mail we only eat once per day and the shares are very meagre. Yes sometimes Father B brings us some food stuffs and that’s once in a month and the food only lasts for a day and then we continue eating once per day. Life is hard for a prisoner in our country. A domestic animal is well looked after than a prisoner. Its pathetic and that’s why there is provision of writing mail and asking help from friends.

Bree, I just have to wrap up the mail. Enclosed are the worded pens. I will tell you more on these pens. You will be remembering me through those pens. Thanks you and God bless,
T

(He also asks me to send him a photo album and a 2007 small diary).

I meant to say that if anyone would like to write to someone in a Zambian prisoner you can view a few of their ads at this address...
http://www.writeaprisoner.com/international-prison-pen-pals.asp

There are many more than that wanting letters but its somewhere to start.
You can also find addresses of prisoners awaiting mail by visiting this site http://www.prisoncare.org/ and clicking on 'prisoners in need'.

Phone Call From Emanuel

I was washing up in the kitchen when the phone rang. For some reason I just knew it would be Emanuel. I picked up the phone and heard the American operator asking if I would accept a collect call, so of course I said yes. And it was Emanuel! We got a 15 minute call but it seemed so much more like 5 minutes. It was great to talk to him, for only the 2nd time after 76 or more letters! He ribbed me for sending him a book which turned out not to be very good. Oooops. I bought it because it was written by a man serving time in a prison in Northern Ireland. I thought it might be interesting to him, but what I didn't realise, because I didn't read the book myself, was that it was about a gay relationship behind prison walls. LOL. Not really Emanuels cup of tea, so he passed it on and had a good laugh at my stupidity. Doh. I told him all about my surprise birthday party (see post below for that). It was so good to talk to him. Really made my day and put a smile on my face :)

Stress levels pretty high

Ahhh, I'm so stressed. I seem to have spent all day looking for lost things. Firstly we have misplaced a christmas present that we got Jude for Christmas. It's quite large (board game sized) so I don't know how we could lose it, but I just can't find it anywhere.

In the last few days Sam has managed to lose his coat (twice), his PE kit (twice), his lunch box, his pencil case (which he had last night) and possibly his brain (the jury is still out on that one). The boy needs to have everything stapled to his personage in order not to lose it. My stress levels are through the roof.

I'm going on Amazon.com now to see if I can order a nice book for my american death row penpal for his Christmas present. I can get it delivered directly from Amazon to save posting it from here. Not sure what to get but it's going to be something heavy!

Update on T in Zambia

Wow, so much has happened since I wrote my last post, about T. My head has been all over the place.

Firstly I was so touched by the people who chose to respond to my blog post. To those who offered to donate money, those who have offered to send a christmas card. Where should I start? I don't want to forget anything. Let me see.

Firstly, my Grandad printed out my post and took it to his church meeting where he read it out loud to the members. They were moved to pray for T and his situation. The leader has contacts in Zambia and they may well be able to find someone willing to visit T and talk with him, which would be a huge blessing to him. They also talked about raising money to send supplies for all of the inmates in Tinkhani's cell, as they are all in the same boat more or less, and to stop T fearing theft or other problems.

Today I posted a small parcel to him. Very small. It contained my letter, a book, and a few treats such as cashew nuts and sweets. It's kind of my 'test parcel'. The idea is to see whether he actually gets the contents or not.

Anyway, where was I? Today I made contact with a group called Prison Fellowship Zambia. I sent them my blog link and asked them if they knew of any missionaries in the area, or anyone trustworthy who may be able to help me. The Bishop emailed me right back and said that they have a prison fellowship group in Kabwe, where T is. He forwarded my email to that group and said that it would be no problem for them to visit with T and to buy him provisions with any money that I send to them. They go into the prisons in the area and minister to the men and women there, whilst helping them in any way that they can with both spiritual and physical needs. I read a page on the Internet that one of the missionaries wrote and they seem to be doing a much needed great job out there. They go into the prisons every day and ask the prisoners what they need, visit their families for them and try to re-start communications with their long lost families, and such like. Obviously they can only work within whatever funds they have available. Won't it be fabulous if one of these missionaries can help us to take care of T, and possibly others, and to visit him as well?

Once again I'd like to say a sincere thank you to those who emailed, or left supportive comments, and an even bigger thank you to those who offered money and christmas cards to T. If anyone else would like to be involved please do let me know. Every little helps, as they say.

Update on Tinkhani

Wow, so much has happened since I wrote my last post, about Tinkhani. My head has been all over the place.

Firstly I was so touched by the people who chose to respond to my blog post. To those who offered to donate money, those who have offered to send a christmas card. Where should I start? I don't want to forget anything. Let me see.

Firstly, my Grandad printed out my post and took it to his church meeting where he read it out loud to the members. They were moved to pray for Tinkhani and his situation. The leader has contacts in Zambia and they may well be able to find someone willing to visit Tinkhani and talk with him, which would be a huge blessing to him. They also talked about raising money to send supplies for all of the inmates in Tinkhani's cell, as they are all in the same boat more or less, and to stop Tinkhani fearing theft or other problems.

Today I posted a small parcel to him. Very small. It contained my letter, a book, and a few treats such as cashew nuts and sweets. It's kind of my 'test parcel'. The idea is to see whether he actually gets the contents or not.

Anyway, where was I? Today I made contact with a group called Prison Fellowship Zambia. I sent them my blog link and asked them if they knew of any missionaries in the area, or anyone trustworthy who may be able to help me. The Bishop emailed me right back and said that they have a prison fellowship group in Kabwe, where Tinkhani is. He forwarded my email to that group and said that it would be no problem for them to visit with Tinkhani and to buy him provisions with any money that I send to them. They go into the prisons in the area and minister to the men and women there, whilst helping them in any way that they can with both spiritual and physical needs. I read a page on the Internet that one of the missionaries wrote and they seem to be doing a much needed great job out there. They go into the prisons every day and ask the prisoners what they need, visit their families for them and try to re-start communications with their long lost families, and such like. Obviously they can only work within whatever funds they have available. Won't it be fabulous if one of these missionaries can help us to take care of Tinkhani, and possibly others, and to visit him as well?

Once again I'd like to say a sincere thank you to those who emailed, or left supportive comments, and an even bigger thank you to those who offered money and christmas cards to Tinkhani. If anyone else would like to be involved please do let me know. Every little helps, as they say.

Meet Tinkhani

I'd like you to meet someone. This is Tinkhani. He lives in Zambia. Tinkhani is a Christian man, serving a death sentence in a Zambian prison. He is one of many thousands of men incarcerated there. Tinkhani has been in prison many years, awaiting either freedom or death, for the crime of robbery. He is not a murderer. He was a very poor man with a wife and children to feed. In order to obtain money for food he agreed to take part in a bank robbery. He was caught, and sentenced to death for his crime. His family have since forgotten him and have never visited him. He is a very poor man indeed.
The conditions in Zambian prisons are horrendous. Click here for some examples.

There are people all over the world suffering. Orphans, hungry families, homeless people, and prisoners. So why should anyone care about a prisoner if there are so many other needy people, who may be far more deserving? That's a good point. The sad fact is that most people are moved when they see a documentary about starving orphans in Liberia, they are moved to tears when they see homeless families in India spending countless cold nights freezing inside make-shift tents. People don't like to see suffering, but for the majority of them, they are moved, and then they make a cup of tea, finish their dinner and forget all about it.

All this suffering sometimes makes me feel so helpless. What is the point of trying to do anything when there are countless more people living in poverty? I have heard it said that we "rich people" are in the minority. For us, this life (having a home, working hard, eating hot meals every day) seems normal, but to the majority of people our lives is a paradise that they can only dream of.

So what can I do to help? Well, those who know me well know that if I wasn't a devoted wife and mother I would sell everything and move to Liberia or Zimbabwe to open an orphanage, or something similar. Obviously I can't do that at the moment. But one thing that I have been doing, for 2 years now, is writing to prisoners. Not randomly writing willy nilly to prisoners, but writing to 4 prisoners. Tinkhani is one of these prisoners. The other 3 live in America (one of those is on death row).

My heart goes out to Tinkhani and others like him. A letter from me is all he has to look forward to. My letters take about 3 weeks to arrive with him. When he reads them he is taken out of his prison, in his mind, to another world. He has never asked me for anything other than friendship and correspondence. He has not asked for money, and I told him in my first letter that I was offering friendship and nothing more. But friendship is the most precious thing in the world to him. Tinkhani is starving. The prison service give him 1 small bowl of rice a day. They expect family to provide food for their incarcerated relatives. But for so many of the men, like Tinkhani, their family have forgotten them. For many years he has lived on this one bowl of rice per day. Some days there isn't any rice and they have to go without. Tinkhani also has AIDS. He didn't know he had AIDS when he went to prison. He almost died from the disease (some part of me wonders if he would have been better off). He gets his medication provided free of charge. The medication often makes him vomit what little food he gets.

I have spoken via email to the prison chaplain, who is a man from Northern Ireland, believe it or not. He knows Tinkhani. He says he does not look at all well, is very undernourished, but praises God every day for his life. (The photo above was taken before he went to prison).

Tinkhani lives in a concrete cell with at least 6 other men. They have no bed, no sink, no toilet, no window. At night when they are locked up he says that the men often hallucinate and believe that they have become small bugs that are able to crawl through the air vent and out to freedom. They have a chamber pot to share. In order to reply to my letter Tinkhani cleans out chamber pots every day for the richer prisoners, and washes their clothes for them. If he does this for two weeks he receives a stamp from them, with which he can write to me.

Tinkhani has asked me in his letters to ask everyone I know to pray for him. He believes that prayer is like dynamite. If you could also remember Tinkhani in your prayers he would be very grateful. He is dreaming of freedom in his latest letter. He will either be freed or hanged.

This Christmas I want to send a care package to Tinkhani. I can easily save the cost of posting these items by eating less take out food, or spending a little less on myself. I haven't decided yet whether to send one large package or whether to send little bits and pieces in each letter. Pretty much anything would make him happy. The prison mail is not checked by the guards and his parcels should remain untampered. I guess non perishable foods, sanitary items, blankets, clothes etc are all things that Tinkhani could use. If anyone has any good ideas of things to send please let me know.

If anyone else would like to write to Tinkhani, offering prayers and/or friendship then please email me and I will give you his address. If anyone would like to send something to him, in the form of a care package or a small treat then please let me know and again I'll give you his address. Anything, no matter how small would help to ease his suffering. Anyone of my family members who is about to buy me a birthday or christmas present, feel free if you like to send something to Tinkhani in leau of my present ;)

Likewise, when writing your christmas cards this year, if you feel you would like to send a card to either Tinkhani, or E (on death row in US) then please let me know and I'll give you their addresses. If you prefer you can put my address as the return address to remain anonymous.

• remember those in prison (Hebrews 13:3).
• Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone (John 8 v.7)
• For ALL have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God (Romans 3 :23)
• The Lord looked down from His sanctuary on high, from Heaven He viewed the earth to hear the groans of the prisoners and release those condemned to death." (Psalms 102:18-20)
• And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. (1 Cor 13 v2)
• And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity. (1 Cor 13v 13)

Meet T

I'd like you to meet someone. This is T. He lives in Zambia. T is a Christian man, serving a death sentence in a Zambian prison. He is one of many thousands of men incarcerated there. T has been in prison many years, awaiting either freedom or death, for the crime of robbery. He is not a murderer. He was a very poor man with a wife and children to feed. In order to obtain money for food he agreed to take part in a bank robbery. He was caught, and sentenced to death for his crime. His family have since forgotten him and have never visited him. He is a very poor man indeed.The conditions in Zambian prisons are horrendous. Click here for some examples.

There are people all over the world suffering. Orphans, hungry families, homeless people, and prisoners. So why should anyone care about a prisoner if there are so many other needy people, who may be far more deserving? That's a good point. The sad fact is that most people are moved when they see a documentary about starving orphans in Liberia, they are moved to tears when they see homeless families in India spending countless cold nights freezing inside make-shift tents. People don't like to see suffering, but for the majority of them, they are moved, and then they make a cup of tea, finish their dinner and forget all about it.

All this suffering sometimes makes me feel so helpless. What is the point of trying to do anything when there are countless more people living in poverty? I have heard it said that we "rich people" are in the minority. For us, this life (having a home, working hard, eating hot meals every day) seems normal, but to the majority of people our lives is a paradise that they can only dream of.

So what can I do to help? Well, those who know me well know that if I wasn't a devoted wife and mother I would sell everything and move to Liberia or Zimbabwe to open an orphanage, or something similar. Obviously I can't do that at the moment. But one thing that I have been doing, for 2 years now, is writing to prisoners. Not randomly writing willy nilly to prisoners, but writing to 4 prisoners. T is one of these prisoners. The other 3 live in America (one of those is on death row).

My heart goes out to T and others like him. A letter from me is all he has to look forward to. My letters take about 3 weeks to arrive with him. When he reads them he is taken out of his prison, in his mind, to another world. He has never asked me for anything other than friendship and correspondence. He has not asked for money, and I told him in my first letter that I was offering friendship and nothing more. But friendship is the most precious thing in the world to him. T is starving. The prison service give him 1 small bowl of rice a day. They expect family to provide food for their incarcerated relatives. But for so many of the men, like T, their family have forgotten them. For many years he has lived on this one bowl of rice per day. Some days there isn't any rice and they have to go without. T also has AIDS. He didn't know he had AIDS when he went to prison. He almost died from the disease (some part of me wonders if he would have been better off). He gets his medication provided free of charge. The medication often makes him vomit what little food he gets.

I have spoken via email to the prison chaplain, who is a man from Ireland, believe it or not. He knows T. He says he does not look at all well, is very undernourished, but praises God every day for his life. (The photo above was taken before he went to prison).

T lives in a concrete cell with at least 6 other men. They have no bed, no sink, no toilet, no window. At night when they are locked up he says that the men often hallucinate and believe that they have become small bugs that are able to crawl through the air vent and out to freedom. They have a chamber pot to share. In order to reply to my letter T cleans out chamber pots every day for the richer prisoners, and washes their clothes for them. If he does this for two weeks he receives a stamp from them, with which he can write to me.

T has asked me in his letters to ask everyone I know to pray for him. He believes that prayer is like dynamite. If you could also remember T in your prayers he would be very grateful. He is dreaming of freedom in his latest letter. He will either be freed or hanged.

This Christmas I want to send a care package to T. I can easily save the cost of posting these items by eating less take out food, or spending a little less on myself. I haven't decided yet whether to send one large package or whether to send little bits and pieces in each letter. Pretty much anything would make him happy. The prison mail is not checked by the guards and his parcels should remain untampered. I guess non perishable foods, sanitary items, blankets, clothes etc are all things that T could use. If anyone has any good ideas of things to send please let me know.

If anyone else would like to write to T, offering prayers and/or friendship then please email me and I will give you his address. If anyone would like to send something to him, in the form of a care package or a small treat then please let me know and again I'll give you his address. Anything, no matter how small would help to ease his suffering. Anyone of my family members who is about to buy me a birthday or christmas present, feel free if you like to send something to T in leau of my present ;)

Likewise, when writing your christmas cards this year, if you feel you would like to send a card to either T, or E (on death row in US) then please let me know and I'll give you their addresses. If you prefer you can put my address as the return address to remain anonymous.

• remember those in prison (Hebrews 13:3).
• Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone (John 8 v.7)
• For ALL have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God (Romans 3 :23)
• The Lord looked down from His sanctuary on high, from Heaven He viewed the earth to hear the groans of the prisoners and release those condemned to death." (Psalms 102:18-20)
• And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. (1 Cor 13 v2)
• And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity. (1 Cor 13v 13)

Death Row in Zambia

I received my second letter today from T, who is on death row in prison in Zambia. It was a very long letter. Two letters actually, and a poem. I stayed in bed today until 11.30! I told Steve I wasn't going to get up as I was shattered from painting the kitchen. So he took Luke to work with him! They had great fun. Luke washed the shop windows and was an all round great little helper. I picked him up at 12 and he was full of stories about how he had helped Daddy. Sam and Jude often work in the shop with Daddy, and he feels so grown up being able to do it too.
So when I got back with Luke at 12 this letter from Zambia had been delivered. It was a sobering start to the day, and helped me to appreciate my life and forget about the little stresses. The first letter I received from him was a basic introduction, which I replied to. This letter was an account of his life, how he ended up in prison, what daily life is like. He was involved in a robbery. They were caught by the police and because he was in possession of a gun he was put onto death row. He says that in Zambia anyone caught with a gun is put on death row. His family have forgotten him. He has been there since 1999. He shares a very small, windowless cell with 5 other men. They do not have toilets in the cell and have to use pots which they empty every day. There is a small vent in the cell, and he says that the prisoners often get delirious and imagine themselves transforming into insects so that they can crawl through the vents to freedom. He says that prison there is very hard for anyone who do not have family. The luckier prisoners can get food and basic necessities from their families, but the unfortunate ones get nothing. Absolutely nothing is provided, apart from one small meal a day. He says that all the poorer men are hungry and they worry constantly about food. He was delayed in writing back to my letter (which he says he had read 10 times, as it was like a visitor to him) because he had no stamps. He had to clean other prisoners toilet pots, and hand wash their clothes, in return for a stamp to reply with.
In his second letter, which was in the same envelope, he told me that he has recently found out that he is HIV positive and he is devastated. The drugs he needs are provided by the hospital, but he has to take them with food, and some times he doesn't have any food to take them with, so they make him ill. He is hoping that I don't judge him for having HIV and that I will still write to him. He has asked me to ask every Christian that I know to pray for him, and for his illness.

After reading his letter I felt grateful for the life that I have, joyous that I could bring a little happiness to the life of someone less fortunate, and scared by the prospect of writing to someone who had nothing else in life to look forward to.

A book for a 45 year old incarcerated male?

Ok, its official, E's prison have changed the rules and now I am allowed to send him books. It's unusual. Before I couldn't send him books at all, even though most of the prisons allow you to send books through Amazon. But now his prison have gone from 'no books at all' to 'as many books as you like - and don't worry about Amazon, you can send them from home'. So, I have a garage full of books left over from the book fair, and one excited pen pal. I wrote and asked him what he likes to read. He replied by saying "I can't wait to see what you pick out for me to read". So my question is - what on earth does a 45 year old male, incarcerated for over 20 years on death row, like to read? I have no idea. I've been into the garage and read the back of a heap of novels. The thing is, I don't know any men who like reading, therefore I have no idea what men read. I know what I like to read. But I also learnt from working at the book fair that people read a lot of stuff that I wouldn't touch with a barge pole. Does anyone have any idea? I've got a pile of books here and I'm going to look up their reviews on Amazon. But all the novels seem a bit girly to me.

Well, today we are off to my sister Jenny's house. Better get ready to leave.

What a busy couples of days. I don't know why I'm always so surprised about how busy life is, as it's never been any different. Its almost 10 pm and I've got 3 letters to write. I've written one already but I have another 3 to reply to. I hope to get at least another one done tonight. Today I received a letter in the post from a man in Zambia. He is on death row too, like my other pen pal in the US. I don't remember ever writing to him. I know I must have done, because he has replied to my letter! But I don't remember it. The way the WAP website works is that you can email your first letter and they post it for you. Subsequent letters must be posted. Obviously I must have stumbled upon his ad one evening and emailed him through their system, but I have no recollection of it. Anyway, he wrote in his letter that he had been praying desperately for someone to write to him. He is going to be executed for armed robbery, although I don't believe he murdered anyone. He has been in prison for 9 years and in that time he has not had a single letter. I felt really sad reading about how much joy my letter had given him. It was like his first visitor, he said. He was elated and thanking God for answering his prayer, yet I don't even remember writing to him. He has become a Christian since his imprisonment and called me Sister Hazel all the way through - I felt like a nun! LOL. Here is one part of his letter
"One thing you have to know is that God has brought us together for a purpose. This is the divine love of God working in you. The Almighty God is speaking to you inside your heart about me, a condemned prisoner. Be assured that this friendship is from above". I'm inclined to believe him since I didn't make a mental decision to write to him myself. It will be interesting to write to him, although I am a little concerned. The pending execution of my 2 year friend in Georgia is enough for me to handle. I don't know if I can go through it twice. I guess the Lord will give me strength.

Anyway, Sam will be celebrating his 11th birthday soon and he wants a trampoline. After enjoying 2 days of bouncing at Jenny's house he is convinced this is what he needs. I have told him it will be his only present because of the cost of it, and he seems fine with that. I will need to get out to the shops some time to buy it... not an easy task when home educating three children.

A few weeks back our fellowship helped one of the men, Barry, move house. His house needed a lot of work done to it to make it leaveable! Every Sunday and Wednesday for 3 weeks everyone cleaned and packed and tidied for him. During this process Steve and the kids collected all the spare change that they found and put it into bags for him. Steve has since spent an hour every day counting that change! Jude would take a bag at a time to the post office to be changed into notes. At our Sunday meeting yesterday Steve told Barry to guess how much money they had collected. He had no idea. Someone guessed about £200 !!! No. They had collected no less that £820 from around his house! Isn't that amazing! So Barry took the fellowship out for Chinesese meal on Sunday evening, with cash from his house. The rest of it is being used to buy a car. Steve made a heap of jokes about informing the royal mint. I wonder how many years it had taken to collect that. He reckons he has about another £200 worth of coins at home that still need changing. We all went toChineseese restaurant here in the town after our Sunday meeting. We had a big round table that we were all able to sit around. Even Luke had a big seat and felt the business sitting with all the adults. The food was lovely, and it made a change to tea and fruit loaf! We did take photos, they will follow soon.

The weather seems to have taken a turn for the worse. The beautiful sunshine has gone, but not before giving my veggies a boost. The sunflowers are now about 3 ft tall. The potatoes and onions are HUGE. But alas, my tomatoes and strawberries have been attacked by greenfly and I had to spray them despite wanting to go organic. But they were covered with them and I was frightened of it spreading to everything else. I must get some sort of organic pesticide for emergencies. The cabbages were attacked by tiny caterpillars but we found most of them and squished them! Nice. Hopefully they will improve. Next year I will just grow the things that we have great success with, I think.

Well, I better go and write a letter whilst I'm still awake enough.