Our family, this week

It's Wednesday evening at 11.20pm and I've climbed into bed to read a book, but somehow ended up with the laptop on my knee. I like Wednesday evenings. It's the night Jimmie (13) and I watch 'The Family' together. It's one of the rare times these days when he comes to sit with me for any length of time. We watch it together and discuss how the family deals with situations, and how we would deal with them. It's really a good time for us both. He always comes and sits and hugs me afterwards, which makes me so happy I could cry. I think watching it helps him to see how parents worry about their kids, and how we only nag and moan because we care. And he sees the teenagers in it behaving the way he does, upsetting their parents, and making up again. It's good for both of us to see, and there's always a good feeling in our house afterwards. I guess its a relief to see that other families face the same issues as we do.

On the subject of teenagers (one in particular) Jimmie came sheepishly up to me this afternoon after school and asked "who is in a better mood? you or Dad?" So right then I knew something was up. He came and sat on the bed with his homework diary and started to explain that he is on report this week for repeated bad behaviour. He had to tell me as there was a note from his form tutor which I have to sign every night. Apparently I will be receiving a letter in the mail from her too, and she has invited me to contact her. So its not good news. He has had Monday detentions three weeks in a row, and a few lunch time detentions, for various things - wearing his uniform too scruffy, talking in class, forgetting homework or books, being late for class. It's one thing after another. His main problem is laziness and a lack of organisation I think. So I sat and had a good talk with him. He obviously thought he was going to be in immense trouble, as he generally agreed with everything I said and agreed to improve his behaviour. I guess he didn't want to push his luck any further. It remains to be seen if we will see a marked improvement. If not I guess a trip to the school will be in order.

We talked about his schoolwork as well. His English homework last night was to describe a room in his house. He chose to talk about the utility room and the reasons that he likes it. He described the smell of bread baking, the smell of the cupboard that holds all the washing powders, the smell of the shoe cupboard, all so imaginatively. It was a really creative piece of writing, but not very long. He told me when he read it to me that it was supposed to be short. So today he came to me and said his English teacher called him to one side to talk to him. She told him that he has a great creative talent for writing, and that she thinks he could take it far, but that he is so lazy and just doesn't put the effort into his work. She feels he is wasting a great talent. So we discussed this and I tried to inspire him to work harder on English. I explained that not everyone can be good at everything. That we all may only find a few things in life that we are truly exceptional at. And when we find such things we should nurture that talent and make the most of it. I told him that he may well only be very good at a couple of subjects, so instead of feeling bad at everything, try to excel in the areas where he can. He seemed to understand and agree. But it remains to be seen whether he can overcome his laziness. He truly is the most lazy person I have ever met. (And I guess my Mum will tell me that he gets that from me!)

Moving on from Jimmie then... Barney has been absent from school one or two days a week since he suffered from a cold about a month ago. He kept waking up at night with excruciating headaches, blocked nose, a croup sounding cough, and a few times even a temperature. So eventually I was forced to take him to the doctors. The doctor thought his sinuses had become infected from the cold, and so gave him some antibiotics to take. He seems a lot better a few days after starting the medication. But while we were at the doctors I pointed out a lump on Barneys chest that I have recently noticed. As his father has Neurofibromatosis (a genetically inherited disease) I thought I should mention it. At first the doctor seemed unconcerned. But then he started feeling up and down Barneys chest wall, and counting. The counting startled me a bit, then eventually he said 'hmm, I think we should get a chest x-ray". So I thought OK, 3 months waiting for an x-ray appointment, but no, the doctor wanted me to get one right away - that afternoon! The 'lump' is hard, like bone, and kind of looks like a broken rib that has healed. I can notice it through his t-shirts, but I know it hasn't been like that since he was born. The doctor asked if I remember a time he could have broken his ribs, but I cant think of anything like that happening. He went on to explain that he couldn't find the right number of ribs on Barneys right chest wall. Two of the ribs seem fused together by bone or something. He said that it could just be a genetic abnormality - that he does actually have two fused ribs - but that an x-ray was needed to make sure it is nothing more sinister. So I took him straight over for his chest x-ray and now we have a 3 week wait for the results.

Annabelle has been mostly a darling the last few weeks. She does her homework without being asked, she generally keeps her room tidy, she is kind to Barney, and she helps me when asked. Hence I don't have much to blog about her. But I don't take it for granted that she's being so great. I know it probably wont last forever, so I appreciate it while I can. Lol. It wont be long until her 12th birthday. She is looking forward to having a little sister to take care of. I think I will barely get to cuddle little Emily once Annabelle gets her hands on her. When I mentioned that she's going to be like a second mother to Emily, Barney piped up with "and I'm going to be like a second Daddy - but I'm not going to change any smelly nappies!"

We are almost 31 weeks pregnant now. I was looking at photos today of babies who were born at 31 weeks gestation and lived to be perfectly healthy children. Our little girl weighs about 4lbs now and is fully grown in length, although she will put on about 1/2lb a week from now until birth. She has moved into the head down position ready for birth and kicks far stronger than any of my other three babies did. Her kicks actually hurt me. It's like being beaten up from the inside. I remember very strong kicks at the end of pregnancy with my others, but they were never so painful. I have started to play a song to her in the womb. I had a song for each of my babies, which they all recognised and calmed down to after birth. You can hear Emily's song by clicking here if you wish to.